I am going to go ahead and title this update March, even though it is technically April, because then I only skipped one month of the updates, ha! I haven't been so inspired to write, not sure why. I haven't been inspired in a lot of areas - working out, sewing, cooking, crafting...and I am so okay with that. I know it will come back - I will do those things again with passion one day (maybe) soon...but for now - I am just keeping busy on all kinds of fronts. I am keeping up with being intentional though - happy to report - Bryan and I have been on 2 intentional fabulous dates - I have been on dates with all three boys - Bryson to the Kids Museum and a movie - Bodie to a mini golf course and Bobby to Pretend City. I have been writing hand written letters every week. It has brought a lot of little blessings to my life and I know I will never regret taking the time to do these things. I am also being intentional with my self and trying to listen to that small still voice and be more present. I am also failing a lot. I lost it on the two littles the other day - trying my darndest not to yell, but man - those two and their constant fighting puts me over the edge...my house is a big giant mess too...i had every intention of a big spring clean fest and yard sale and it is looking more and more like that will never happen. this bothers me because clutter bothers me and every room seems so cluttered to me - but i just am kind of living in the chaos because we are rarely home on the weekends to take care of it. Learning to give myself an extra dose of grace and know that it will eventually happen.
The month of March for me (and us) was equal parts amazing and heartbreaking. My Grandpa Wally passed away, but as sad and horrible and heart wrenching that is - the memorial service was so great - really restorative for my family and there has been such amazing light showing through those cracks, it is hard to be sad for too long when you dwell on that. I also got to get away with my mom and sister(s) to Carlsbad for a weekend - also a girls day with my Westmont girls to the Getty- lets just say i am trying to balance out all this very boy time with plenty of girly girl time! I have a supportive husband who understands my plight :) This month I started caddying Bryson once a week and he started giving me lessons - I am just throwing up a white flag and giving in to this whole golf thing. I figure I will need to if I ever want to spend time with my boys when they are older.
Bobby!! I swear, like 5 times a day either myself or Bryan exclaim, "Bobby is such a rad kid!" I was watching him at the beach yesterday afternoon just absolutely delighting in him - his big teethy smile, his amazing chest forward all out run, his giggle, his lightening fast pace, his jumping in the water then running to cover himself with sand, just everything. He can be equal parts a stinker, don't get me wrong - but just such a joy of a kid! We were at a birthday party for his best buddy and there was a skateboard and all the adults were just watching him and laughing and I decided there needed to be a bobby reality show - he is so entertaining. Bobby has been playing all kinds of sports - loves baseball right now. He is still committed to his paci and "baby" and that needs to probably change, but I know it will be the end of him napping and when that happens, 4:00pm will be when hell on earth happens in the form of cranky bobby. I heard someone casually remark that the youngest child always shirks responsibility on other people, and that stuck with me, because I can totally see why that happens. I am trying to be more conscious of that with him and stick to my guns (which is hard with the third) and make sure he finishes whatever I make him start :)
Bodie O!! Bodie started T ball - The Marauders. It is his first time playing baseball and this is my first baseball season where I can actually watch a baseball game. For the last 3 seasons I chased babies or nursed babies or both. So I am enjoying this and Bodie is such a slugger - every game I hear people talking about him and how good he is and I make sure to tell him. I think sometimes he feels...actually I know sometimes he feels like he is in his brother's shadow because Bryson gets so much attention for golf, but this kid is going to be amazing all on his own and I tell him so every chance I get! We do coach pitching for t-ball and bodie hit one the other game and it hit the fence! which is not done often in t-ball! he was really proud of himself! he is also making friends and goofing off every chance he can get too!
We have had some struggles with pre-school and listening and sitting still and I struggle with that in him as well. Trying to find a balance between what is absolutely normal for a boy and for a bodie and also expectations on how to behave. I navigate these waters very carefully. Bodie also likes to fixate on things - that first picture of him is at a physical (for Kindergarten enrollment!) and he thought he was going to get a shot and he was freaking out and crying and trying to escape for 2 hours. Turns out he didnt need one so that was all for nothing (sigh). Also trying to figure out how to navigate that whole thing as well.
Bryson! Can you see him...teeny tiny kayak-er! Bryan found a (brand new) kayak at a yard sale for $75 last week! so we have been itching to take it out for a spin and a gorgeous day yesterday made us do just that! it fits inside my car so i will be able to take it out by mysefl (i struggle with tying anything to the roof of my car) So excited to get some arm muscles!!
Bryson has been golfing like a mad man. He has been practicing every day - I have gotten to go out with him a bunch. He has been trying to work on not losing his stuff when he misses a birdie putt or makes a bad shot - and Bryan said at his last tournament he played great and held it together amazing, so maybe I can proclaim progress? we shall see. Golf is such a great spot for learning patience and self-control. also integrity. I am so proud of this kid though - for his determination and his drive and his focus. He got third place last week and it was such a show of how hard he has been working - so proud! He has a couple weeks off and I am trying to get him to do other things than golf...but seriously its all the kid wants to do! He didn't complain about kayaking though - he fished off of it yesterday - so fun! Also should mention - he shot 2 under on the back nine at Heartwell and got his best score (38) at little rec this month!
Other big bryson news - we have decided to homeschool him next year. After beginning this school year and Bryson asking every day and me thinking in my mind, no friggin way...we have come to this. it is both scary and super exciting. He hasn't had the best experience this year and HATES hates hates school, so learning how to LOVE learning again for him is top priority for me! We will be doing some classes in a classroom, classes with friends, private tutoring with Auntie and of course lessons at home. I think he is going to have so much fun! Bodie is already asking to be home schooled too...and I have considered it, but don't think I have the personal time to teach him the basics of reading/writing. We will see how this year goes and how well it fits in with our business, etc.
